Recovery and Resolve
by 2manyfandoms
Summary: The rest of her family had gone inside, leaving her all by herself, in the hot sun, in a place she didn’t know, with no one to watch over her" Ginny's thoughts as she waits for her family during their vacation in Egypt. One-shot. just a short drable :


Recovery and Resolve

Ginny looked around herself warily, discreetly. The rest of her family had gone inside, leaving her all by herself, in the hot sun, in a place she didn't know, with no one to watch over her. In a way she felt lonely, abandoned, but she knew the moment Bill said that this pyramid was not the nicest that her mother would forbid her, and she also knew that if she didn't do something she was going to be stuck out side with her mother or one of her brothers waiting for the rest of them to come out.

At first she had needed to have someone with her, she didn't like being alone, afraid that Tom would come out of nowhere and take over her again. She was afraid of being alone, afraid that if she was left alone she would do horrible things. But after getting home, after being in the Burrow with all her family around her except for her two oldest brothers she started to become….smothered.

She didn't blame them, she had been clingy at first, but when she started trying to distance herself they took it as a sign that she needed to be even more closely watched, and that she couldn't deal with right now. She needed some space, space to think, to….figure out what had happened.

She knew the big picture, she had been possessed. She had set a giant, poisonous snake on a bunch of defenceless class mates. She had been rescued, an inch from death, by her childhood hero. A class ate as well, someone else that had to face the basilisk, and even worse, Tom.

But that wasn't what she was trying to piece together. When she first heard about the trip to Egypt she had felt relieved, in such a strange place, a new and unknown place, surely her parents would get lost in the myriad of new things, in talking to Bill, whom they hadn't seen in months. In keeping track of the twins, who had been discussing the possibilities, the potential for new mischief as soon as they had heard of the trip, but somehow her mother always found some way to keep an eye on her.

Ginny sighed as she swung her legs; she was sitting on a large block, probably once a part of the pyramid in front of her, and tilted her head back slightly taking in the warmth of the sun. Sometimes, Ginny felt so alone, after one of her nightmares, after a flashback, she just felt like no one wanted her. How could they? After what she had done she didn't blame them.

And yet, lately she had started to feel sick and tired of feeling like this. She was only 11, not yet 12, and she was still a child, physically if in no other way. And that was the crux of the problem. She didn't feel like she had before the whole diary incident. She had been thinking about it when she could and had decided that she couldn't really be a naïve, child after what she had been through. She had been bloody possessed, for Merlin's sake! How could she be naïve after that?

So she was no longer a naïve, innocent child. So what was she? She was almost 12 years old, and yet she knew things no 11 year old should know. She hadn't told anybody but she had…retained some of Tom's knowledge. When he had started to….share some of his secrets, his...essence with her she had subconsciously learned some of it. So now she knew things, some weren't that bad, she was pretty sure she knew some defence spells and a few charms and transfiguration ones. The knowledge, however was splotchy, for some things she knew the theory, for others the wand movement, and others she only just recognized the name.

What bothered her was the dark knowledge she had. It wasn't terribly extensive, Ginny mused that even subconsciously she had shied away from the knowledge. She could recognize certain curses from their incantations now and maybe cast one or two, nothing she wanted to try, but she was sure she knew more about the dark arts than she ever wanted to know.

So she was an almost twelve year old who knew things she shouldn't, serious, deadly, dark things. That kind of knowledge changed you, so that was where she was stuck. She hadn't the foggiest idea what she was. A twelve year old who felt like a sixteen year old? Was that even normal? Then again, she was the first female Weasley in decades, and that wasn't normal.

Ginny sighed. Sometimes she felt so ... old. Some days she heard Ron and wondered how he could say something so dumb or look at the twins and think that they were acting like children. Ginny lowered her head and looked for a shady place, it felt good at first, but the sun was becoming much too hot and she would get sunburned soon if she didn't move into a shadier spot. And yet some days she felt just like a child, Ginny mused as she slid of the large stone and moved to her left where a ledge of sorts had formed near the pyramid, it was a small spot but she was a small person.

Some days Ginny felt just like Ron or the twins, felt like playing a prank on her brothers, or like everything else could wait. A cry made her turn, and notice a family not too far away. They were a small family, just two parents and two children, one of them about the twins age, the other about Ron's. The younger, a girl, had fallen, tripped over some of the uneven ground or the piles of rubble. From the looks of it she had hit her elbow and had a cut herself. Her family rushed to her, her older brother helped her up while her mother took out some sort of packet from which little napkin looking things came out and started wiping at the gash. The father moved away, back to the way they had come she supposed, and shortly came back with a piece of paper. He talked to his kids and the girl moved her arm around some. Her father nodded and she and her brother got up and started looking around again while he and his wife discussed something; the mother looked worried, but calmed down somewhat when he talked to her.

Ginny looked back at the entrance to the pyramid, her own family would soon be coming back, and would once again be smothering her in their protectiveness. She loved her family, and perhaps she needed to show them that she was better, perhaps she could show them that she was... older now. That she wouldn't- couldn't make the same mistake twice. That she wasn't that weak. She had lived through being possessed, she had learned things, and not just about spells and curses, also about life. She was stronger, she would be older she decided. A determined expression coming over her features, she would become stronger and more powerful; she wouldn't be completely dependent on anyone. She could do things herself. Help was fine, and appreciated, but she wouldn't rely on others for things she could do herself.

She didn't ever want to be the damsel in distress again, if she hadn't let herself become so weak at Hogwarts she wouldn't have forgotten what her father had always told them, she would have shown the book to someone and not made excuses for it.

From now on Ginny wouldn't depend on anybody else for everything. Her family would be there for her if she needed them; Ron had been with Harry at first, after all. But if she could learn how to do it herself, then she would.

Even if it was only little by little, she could do this. She had to do this. Ginny took a deep breath, her resolve becoming firmer and firmer.

"Ginny? Ginny, dear?" Ginny turned, her mother was calling her, they had come out of the pyramid and she hadn't noticed.

"Ginny?!"

"Over here Mum!" Ginny called, as she got out of her little shady spot. "Sorry mum, it was getting too hot, I didn't want to get sunburned." She explained quickly, not wanting to get scolded or worried over. "How was it? Where there any mummies? What did you see? Did it smell musty in there?" Ginny asked rapidly to her brothers.

Molly shook her head, while her boys started answering her little girl's questions. They would try to scare her for sure, and after what she had just been through!

"Fred! George! Don't say that! Honestly, you boys have no sense whatsoever!"

A/N: Well, there it is. I don't really know why I wrote this other than that it kept popping up in my mind. I mean the books never really say anything about how she managed to recover from being possesed, so I figured I'd try it. This is my first HP fanfic so tell me what you think.


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